Clarity

Ahh.... I finally have some clarity in my life!! Ever since Derek and I have moved back it seems like every single plan has fallen apart left and right. Every job we've applied for, every house/apartment we've looked at, absolutely EVERYTHING has fallen through.
Our minds have changed over and over. What we thought we wanted didn't happen, and I look back and I'm SOO glad it didn't work out that way!!
Today I had another job interview. Normally I don't really like to post about job interviews, b/c it sucks when you think you have a job and tell everyone, and then it comes around that you don't get the job after all that. Well ever since I found out I had this interview, it seems like all of a sudden a rush of clarity rushed into my body. I FINALLY know that I want to live in Idaho Falls, we FINALLY both know that we want to go to BYU-Idaho, and we are FINALLY starting to get some direction in our lives!! GOLLY it feels AMAZING!!!
Who really is the one to say that everything will go according to plan from here on out..... but I finally have some peace and comfort in knowing that everything will work out, and everything is going to be ok! There is an apartment we have been thinking about renting in Ammon. The downstairs apartment should be available now, and we are going to call the land lord and see if we can view the downstairs apartment. Who is to say that we are FOR SURE going to live here.... but as of right now it feels really exciting! We were going to be living in one of my dad's rental houses until it sold.... but guess what? As soon as we decided to live there, someone wants to lease it. Of course!! That is just 1 of the many examples of what has fallen through for us, but obviously, we weren't meant to be there at this time.
I feel such a great amount of comfort in knowing that my prayers are heard. I have been fasting, praying, and reading my scriptures daily so that we would know what direction we needed to take in our lives. It is such a blessing to know that my Heavely Father loves and cares about us, and when we do what is right, the blessings are opened up unto us.
It is so easy to fall into a slump and get lost in this crazy world we live in. When we take time out of our every day lives to give back to Heavely Father, and to show our gratitude, he opens up his arms and comforts us. I am sooo grateful for this gospel, and for all of my testimony building experiences that I go through in life. I feel stronger than I felt before we moved here. I love the Ah Ha moments in life when you look back and you realize why you had to go through a struggle in your life. I love how trials bring me closer to my Heavenly Father, and I love how I always come out a better person in the end. Right now I feel so overwhelmingly blessed for all that I have in my life!! I am so grateful for this comfort I have in my life at this time!

Random Facts

Here are some random facts that you should know about me. Enjoy!

- I tie my shoes completely different from anyone else!!! I never cease to amaze people by the way I tie my shoe. I never knew I tied my shoes differently until high school... but apparently, I tie my shoes in a pretty facsinating way.

-I'm not afraid of getting attached to people. I LOVE getting to know people inside and out! I love making new friends and I love people in general! I'm not afraid of getting close to someone even if it means my heart gets ripped out in the end.

- I am pretty shy when I first meet people.... but once I'm comfortable... I am CRAZY!

- I just recently have realized that I am a super competetive person. Sometimes it's fun... but sometimes I drive myself nuts! I make competitions out of every day activities haha. I'm currently working on this!

- I knew I was going to marry Derek the moment I laid eyes on him. That was my dream boy all wrapped up in a package. That's who I wanted, and that's who I got. He's even better then I could have ever imagined my dream boy being!!

- I know you already know that I absolutely LOVE dancing!! It's my passion, and it's my release. I have ALWAYS planned on dancing throughout my entire life. I always planned on getting a career and degree, but I've always known in the back of my mind that no matter what I want to teach on the side.

- I recently discovered that I am pretty sure I'm allergic to peanuts. I ate some peanuts from a can and touched my eye. My eye was swollen shut for 2 days. Same can of peanuts were put on my salad, and my throat got closed shut. Needless to say, I haven't touched peanuts since. It's a pitty b/c I ate peanut butter on a daily basis until that awful day of the can of peanut incident.

- I am a tender heart. I will probably cry if something happens to you before you do. I HATE when other people go through something sad. I would rather take the crap then watch someone else go through it. Even if someone punched me in the face and told me they hated me, I would still cry for them if something sad happened to them.

- Bad trait about me.... I forgive, but I don't forget. I remember something as silly as someone calling me a name in Elementary school. I forgive people, but I don't really forget when they hurt me.... probably b/c I'm afraid of them doing it again. This is a bad quality about me! I have been working really hard on this!!

- I have this ridiculous laugh that comes out in the middle of the night when I am in a silly mood. Only very special select people have heard this laugh. When this laugh comes out... everyone is laughing. It sounds absolutely ridiculous!! It even includes gasping and snorting on occasion. If you are one of the lucky ones who has witnessed this laugh.... I hope you are ok with still being my friend.

- Lastly..... I think that the prettiest people in this life are the HAPPY ones. They are so inspiring and strong. They are uplifting and I absolutely LOVE being around these types of people!

I hope you enjoyed these random facts!!! Hope you are all having a safe and happy summer!! Love ya guys!!

Dreamer

So I have decided that I am quite the DREAMER! For those of you that really know me... you know that I am always setting goals and working towards something. Sometimes lets face it... I'm not truly realistic. I day dream about my childhood when a certain smell reminds me of something. Sometimes I get stuck back when life was easy and why does it have to get so tough? Sometimes I dream about becomming a professional dancer. I picture myself on a big gorgeous stage, I feel the bright lights on my powdered face, I look out to the crowd and see the auditorium packed full of people, the theater has 2 balconies, and I am the lead dancer. Everyone is cheering for me as I take my bow, and then I look back to see my backup dancers smiling at me and admiring their own performance. In my dreams I can do 7 pirouettes. I can kick my face off, I can move however I want to, and I can jump higher than anyone else. If only...... but let's face it. In order to become a professional..... I wouldn't be able to have a personal life. I wouldn't be able to be a mom until my career was over, I wouldn't be able to see much of Derek, and not only that but I would probably have to dance with other men all day everyday. That is no life for a strong marriage

So after I get to thinking that I wouldn't be able to be a mom until my 30s, then I begin to dream about being a mom. Not just any ordinary mom.... an AWESOME mom! I stay thin and fit, I'm the cool mom, my kids are perfect and have striking features, and I have the picture perfect family. Not only am I an awesome mom.... all of a sudden I have all these home making skills. I can sew, cook, scrapbook, draw, can food, etc. Well all of a sudden in the middle of my day dream I begin to gag. I realize that this is a disgusting dream because I can't stand those picture perfect families. This realistically is not me at all. In fact, these types of moms make me kind of sick because they are incredibly talented! I am not a homemaker... and I feel as though I'm never going to become the best homemaker. This day dream is NOT me. Having a picture perfect family is fake in every way. I love those down to earth people that make mistakes and admit it. I love the homes I go into where I'm immediately loved and welcome, and they accept me...flaws and all. After I realize that that's the person I am... a down to earth, flawed young lady, I'm ok about my realization that this dream will never fully come true.

After my other 2 dreams have been shot down, I begin to dream about traveling the world. There is nothing wrong with this dream at all!! Ok..... let's face it, I dream big so there are some unrealistic points thrown in. First of all...... I'm a newlywed, my traveling has to wait until we have some more money. Sometimes I dream about Derek and I traveling to 3rd world countries. We help relieve the pain and disaster, and help people struggling. Well this dream is ok... but if I want to help anyone medically I'm going to have to have a degree in something medical, and if I go there to teach..... well by golly I better know what I'm teaching!! Haha but someday really and truly I think this would be awesome to do as a couple. I want to go somewhere with a beautiful gorgeous beach, and I want to take a trip to the eastern states to visit some history sites, not only to do with the founding of the country but also with the church. In my dream we travel to ITALY!!! Once again.... this is my absolute DREAM place to travel to. I have always been drawn to Italy. Not only is their food remarkabely delicious, but the language is beautiful, the country is flawless, and the people are wonderful. Right now I am trying to strike up a deal with Derek. If I learn Italian fluently.... he will take me to Italy. Derek is not down with this bet. I need some sort of strategy to get him to agree on this bet with me! Any ideas?!


Day dreaming helps me to escapse the crap thrown at me. Dreaming helps me to pursue goals and to work towards something (when I'm realistic that is). Dreaming can bring peace and joy to my life. When I hear music I automatically begin dancing whether it's physically or in my head. I am so grateful that I have been blessed with the talent of dance in my life. I can dream up beautiful dances in my head, the challenge is getting it out of my head and choreographing and moving in the same movement that takes place in my dreams. Which all leads me to the reason I began this ambitious post. I have all these dreams, and now the fear of pursuing those dreams kicks in. In my life the debate of what career I should pursue is a toss up between becoming a Physical Therapy Assistant, or a dance teacher. I decided to pursue PTA because it is more stable. In order to pursue this career, Arizona was brought into the picture. I worked at a physical therapy office and enjoyed it quite nicely. School however did not work out. The waiting list to get into the program was 2 years long, and other things brought Derek and I back to Idaho. Here I am stuck in thought whether I should wait a year and apply to the PTA program at ISU, or if I should go to BYU Idaho, get my bachelors in Exercise Science and minor in Dance. I have decided to go to BYUI, however I am still debating whether to apply for the program at ISU next year or not. Right now I feel soo strongly about persuing a career in dance. Now... here comes all my dreams again. I want to use dance as a way of helping other people. I dream of helping alzheimer and dimentia patients. By teaching them dances, it helps these patients with their memorization skills. I want to teach cancer patients and let them feel joy in the pain they are facing. I want to teach suicidal teens who have no confidence. I want them to love themselves and gain confidence within themselves. Dances such as the flamenco are all about confidence and I feel like teaching dances like these to these teens could help them immensely. I want to help people suffering from autism, down syndrome,cystic fibrosis, and ADHD. I want to help them to have a longer attention span and to help get their bodies mobile. Maybe somehow I can combine Physical Therapy and Dance? Or maybe I can just teach dance and help many people along the way. This goal is PERFECTION in my eyes. I have HUGE goals, and this is everything I could ever want out of a goal. Opening up a dance studio is very realistic.... teaching people suffering from all these different types of conditions though? I'm not sure how to approach all of this. Somehow I want to pursue this dream. I want to help others and become the dance teacher and role model that I know I can be.

Yup.... I'm still alive

Ok..... so I do apologize to all you bloggers because I most definately waited WAY too long to post something!!! But yes, I'm still here, and yes we are doing well! We are now living in Idaho YAY!!! The move up was RIDICULOUS!!!! We were in a HUGE rain/hail/snow storm from Provo all the way to Malad... and it was freakin May 22 for crying out loud!!! When we left Arizona the heat had broke 100 degrees for the first time of the year.... when we got to Idaho.... it was windy and rainy and grey. Raylon drove the Uhaul, I drove our car, and Derek drove Raylon's car. It was a grueling 15 hours, and adding pouring rain, plowing through puddles, hydroplaning, and almost hitting cars that had slid out of control and were sitting side ways on the highway was a wee bit stressful.
We finally arrived to Idaho and began our awesome adventure to see our new country house... literally a country house *blegh* We drove, and we drove and we drove until finally we arrived at our little country home north of Rexburg. The land lord... was PSYCHO!! and that was an understatement!! She had basically lied about everything that she told me about the house... and Derek and I soon found ourselves in a BIG disaster. When I say this... I mean we literally will never see a house like this again!! The kitchen was BRIGHT green and Gold, the cupboards were metal (like a locker), the carpet was nasty green and gold flowers... I thought that if I spilt water on the floor that the flowers would grow out of the carpet. Ok..... not to mention.... every room was covered with sheer drapery. This wasn't any ordinary drapes..... they were NASTY colors such as PINK, GREEN, TEAL, GOLD etc. When Derek asked the land lord if one of the drapes was broken... she went off on Derek and told him that only city folk worry about keeping their windows covered so no one could see in. Then she went off about how she has never locked her door in her entire life and she has been just fine. Ok... she was soo weird! Along with our beautiful kitchen, and drapery among the house... we also had a PINK tiled bathroom.... head to toe!! AWESOME!! We also had a hand made clothes line hanger INSIDE our very own house. Ok.... so first of all we are way out in the middle of nowhere.... we are in a HIDEOUS home, and then... to top it all off we have a PSYCHO land lord. YUCK!!
Because of the sheer drapery within our home... we had absolutely NO privacy. Due to this matter, I would look out the window and see our landlord snooping around our yard and peeking in our house... can you say creepy?! She also came over at least 5 times the day we moved. Oh sorry I forgot to mention, the psycho land lord lived NEXT DOOR to make matters worse! Anyways... she came over a billion times... not only is this uncomfortable.... but she would stay..... and she wouldn't leave. It was horrible. This house was her dead husband's dead mother's house. She wanted to keep it the EXACT same way her mother in law left it. She even asked Derek if he would plant flowers in the garden b/c it would remind her of her mother in law. Our stove/oven had a manual with a 50's girl on the cover. I'm pretty sure that SOME things really should be updated over the years wouldn't you say? She told us that we had to read the manual before we used the stove or oven b/c if everything wasn't wired just precise it could start a fire. Can you say WOW? Now... we're in this creepy situation, and then the landlord started changing how much money we owed her... is that even legal? Nope.... but she thought it was! I'll get back to that detail in just a minute. When I talked to the landlord on the phone before we moved, she told me that the house was very well insulated, and we would never have to turn on the heat. BULL CRAP!!! Our house was FREEZING!! It had no insulation and it held no heat whatsoever. In order to heat our house we had to use the propane tank. Derek called the company and asked how much it cost. In order to fill the tank, it cost $200, and he told Derek that the average bill we would have to pay to fill it during the winter months would be $500, and then we would actually have to pay the heating bill on top of that!! Excuse me.... but the landlord was a filthy liar!!! At this point.... we knew immediately that we had to get out of the situation!!! We gave our 30 days notice, but told her if she wanted someone in it before the 30 days.... we could be out. Soo.... the last day of the month she called us and told us we needed to be out that night!!! EXCUSE ME!!! Psycho lady... that's not right at all!! But, because of the situation we were already in, and because she kept taking our money, we knew that we HAD to get out of the situation before she pushed any more money on us.
Well we got a big crew together, hunted down a truck and trailer and unpacked all of our stuff within 2 hours. Now comes the crappy part. The landlord decided that she wasn't going to give us back our security deposit b/c she held the house for half a month until we moved in. Little did she know that my dad is a lawyer and that what she was doing was illegal. Her husband and her RAILED into Derek and I, and I have never seen a fight so nasty. Basically what it was coming down to was we would be seeing them in court b/c they took our money. Finally, after I started crying my eyes out, the husband softened up a little bit and they agreed to give us back half of the deposit, and then take off what we owed them for the 10 days we were in the house. This is after the fact that they just increased the price we owed them for the 10 days over five times. Derek and I agreed to take the $96, basically because we didn't want to deal with these crazy people anymore!! We lost about $250, but we learned a valuable lesson! It sucks going through experiences such as these, but you always come out a better person in the end!!
Because we only had 1 day to get out, we are now staying with my parents. Does it suck? YES. Is it better then the alternative? ABSOLUTELY!!! I'm so grateful for my awesome parents for helping us during this super hard time, and I'm grateful for my amazing husband to go through these crappy times with!! Luckily while we were living in Arizona..... we were frugal with our money so due to our unemployment and set back with everything, we are doing just DANDY! We've also done a TON of odd jobs for people so we've been making money here and there through it all!! I really am happy with where I am in life because I feel stronger and better for it!
Now... I know that you people are thinking to yourself... how did Derek and I get into this situation and why did we move into that house? The answer to this question my friends is that I trusted someone. She gave me her word and she lied. Will I go through this again? NOPE!! Will I ever put my trust in someone like this again NEVER!! But, please everyone just look out!! This crap is so easy to fall into and scamming is absolutely ridiculous!! Be careful and I love you guys!! Thank you to everyone who has been so helpful!!

Finally..... an update!!!

Wow.... things have been super crazy busy over here at the Dawson home! We had spring break, my parents visited, we made a quick trip to Utah, and we've been slammed with homework. One thing at a time though!! First off, I had SOOO much fun when my parents came!!
Day 1: We hiked the Windcave trail at Usery Mountain Pass. It was the perfect length of a hike! The windcave at the top really actually ended up being an overhead hang with flower like pot things hanging from the top. Sadly, it was infested with bees, red beatles, and little chipmunks. Needless to say, we didn't spend much time at the top. Also... not long into the hike, I was leading the way in front of my parents. We were talking and all of a sudden we heard a loud rattle. I stopped immediately, and a rattle snake came out of the bushes and crossed the trail literaly a foot in front of me. My heart began racing and I couldn't move, then... it hit me and I started saying, "OH my gosh, oh my gosh it's a rattlesnake!!!" and I ran behind my parents. Haha the whole time they were saying, "Mary, get out the camera, that's really cool."
After the hike we went to Lee Lee's, which is an Oriental food market. My dad served his mission in Japan so he LOOVED Lee Lee's! I couldn't get my parents to leave, but i'm glad they had a lot of fun, and bought some really interesting food! After Lee Lee's we went to Boa Ba's, tried their really weird drinks, then picked up Derek from work. After that we we went to Barro's pizza, but... ended up on a very long detour! We finally made it and scarfed down our pizza. We ate at Barro's b/c they have a new gluten free pizza so my dad was able to eat it. My dad just recently found out that he is a celiac, so it was kind of challenging trying to find food that my dad could eat! After Barro's, we went to Alice in Wonderland 3D. Day 1 was a succes!!
Day 2: My parents and I went to the Phoenix zoo!! We had a lot of fun, and this day it got up to 91 degrees. It was SOO dang hot!! After the zoo, we chilled at the hotel for a bit, and then made our way to the Chandler Fashion Center. The Chandler Fashion Center is the BIG mall down here!! My parents couldn't believe how big it was, they thought it was so neat! After, the mall, we went back to my apartment. Derek and I made them yummy fajitas!! So delicious!! After that we went to the Mesa Temple and watched the Easter pageant!! It was unbelievable how many people were there!! The pageant was well done, and gave me chills at the end when Christ was resurrected. It was an awesome experience!
Day 3: Derek finally had work off! We spent the day at the Dodger's Spring training game!! We had another detour on the highway... but we made it!!! We were cheering for Manny the whole time, and I even bought a #1 finger. My dad made fun of me the whole time, but I just HAD to have it! haha. The sun was on our right side the entire time... so let's just say all of us came back a little uneven! I had a line right down the middle of my legs with the right side BRIGHT red and the other side still white. It was a little embarrassing. After the game, we went to RA sushi! Love the sushi, hate the atmosphere!! The sushi is sooo good, and we went during happy hour so everything was super cheap!!!
What a FUN time!! We were able to do so much, and my parents loved everything about it!! I'm so grateful for my dear parents!! I love them so much, and they are amazing!!! Here's some pictures, sorry they're not in order!























What a fun time we had!!! I wish they could come back and visit again!!! There are still things I need to blog about..... but that took forever so I am done for the day!!!! More news coming soon!! :)

Just for fun!

When is your "engagement" anniversary:
April 26, 2008

2. When is your "marriage" anniversary:
Aug. 15, 2008

3. How long have you known your spouse:
Just under 5 years. Technically though, we met each other when we were about 8 years old playing night games, but we didn't "really" get to know each other back then.

4. How long did you date/court before you were engaged:
2 1/2 years.

5. Where did you meet your spouse for the first time?
The VERY first time was playing night games in my backyard, we met again at ballroom nationals in Provo.

6. What is your spouse's full name:
Derek Ray Dawson :)

7. Do you have any children:
None yet!

8. How many - boys/girls:
None

9. Do you have any house pets:
No.... we have allergies, and we also don't want to pay the extra fee at our apt.

11. Do you live in the country or town/city:
City, we found out that we're more of the country folk though haha.
.
12. What are some of your favorite activities together:
Dancing, boating, 4 wheeling, cuddling, movie watching, hiking, game playing and traveling.

13. Do you have a favorite vacation spot:
Umm.. we liked traveling to Arizona before we moved here, but we would like to travel to some place with a beach.

14. When did you first kiss?
Exactly a week after our first date.

15. What church do you attend?
The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints!

16. Did you get married in a church? Where?
The Idaho Falls Temple

17. What town is your current address at:
Chandler

18. Do you work or stay at home:
I work.... way too much!!

19. Where did you go on your honeymoon:
Salt Lake City

20.What was the funniest gift you gave when dating?
While we were on ballroom tour, one of the teachers talked Derek into buying me a ring with his name on it. haha

21.How long have you been together?
4 1/2 years

22. How long did you know each other before you started dating?
7 years when we first met, 8 months from the second time we met, and 3 months after we were ballroom partners and really started to get to know each other.

23. Who asked who out?
Derek's cousin (which is my good friend) actually invited us both to go to the haunted house, but after that, Derek got my number and asked me out.


25.Where do you each work or go to school?
I work at Physicians Physical Therapy, and Derek works at SCP. We both go to Chandler Gilbert Community College.

26. Which situation is the hardest on you as a couple?
Umm... that is a tough one, I'm not sure.

27. Did you go to the same school?
Nope... our schools were rivals.

28. Are you from the same home town?
Nope

29. Who is smarter?
Derek, but we both have our own subjects we are good at.

30. Who is more sensitive?
I am.... I'm a little softy

31.Where do you eat out most as a couple?
Texas Roadhouse

32. Where is the furthest you two have traveled together as a couple?
Ensenada

33.Who has the craziest exes?!
Derek...

34. What is something that first attracted you about him/her?
Tall, dark, handsome and a dancer.

35. Who does the cooking?
Both of us

36. Who is more social?
I am

37. Who is the neat-freak?
Derek!!

38. Who is more stubborn?
Me... :p

39. Who hogs the bed?
That would be me.... poor Derek!

40. Who wakes up earlier?
Derek is my early bird

41. Where was your first date?
The Haunted Mill.... it was a good reason to hold his hand :)

42.Who had more boyfriends/girlfriends?
I did

43. Do you get flowers often?
Nah, I'm not too big on that..

44. How do you spend the holidays?
Together and with the rest of our family. I am all for family traditions!

45. Who is more jealous?
That would be me

46. How long did it take to get serious?
Umm... we became exclusive a month after our first date. We had our little break ups but we always knew that we were supposed to be together. It honestly didn't take long at all to get serious.

47. Who eats more?
Well this is a toss up. I eat a lot consistently... BUT, Derek goes through phases where he could eat our whole fridge! So he fluctuates.

48. Who does the laundry?
We both do. I am usually the designated folder though. Folding laundry is a chore that I really don't mind.

49. Who’s better with the computer?
Derek is.

50. Leave a piece of advice for the other couples:
-Don't go to bed mad.
-Don't hold things in. Let it all out and talk about it.
-Look forward in your marriage.
-If you're religious.... keep it as the focus in your marriage. Pray together, read scriptures together, and stay strong together.

My Parents are Coming!!!

WOOHOO!!! My parents are on their way this very minute to come and visit Derek and I!! It's going to be so much fun!! I have planned some fun things to go out and do.... but honestly, the thing I can't wait for is to just be able to see them!!! It's super hard living 900 miles away from my family, and I am just so grateful that my parents are going to be able to come down and see us. It will be fun to show them our apartment and catch up on all the things going on in life. I seriously have the best family in the world and I love them to pieces!! I'm sad that Julia and Karl couldn't come with my parents, but I'm grateful that at least my parents can make this trip!!!
Things you should know about my parents are:
1. They are pretty much the funniest people in the world, and I almost pee my pants from laughing whenever my parents get on their kicks.

2. They make an amazing team. They've shown me how a marriage should be, and they balance each other out perfectly. My parents are best friends and they are so happy together.

3. They've taught me everything I know. My parents taught me to be the person I am today, and I'm so grateful for the mannerisms and the love that they showed me to have for others. It seems like many kids these days do not show respect or love, and I am so grateful for my knowledge of this importance, and I will someday teach my own children to have love and respect for others.

4. They are supportive and loving of their children.

5. They are super smart and very hard working!!!!

6. They taught me to have my own testimony, and because of them I have the firm foundation that I have in the gospel and with my beliefs.

Basically, I could go on and on about my wonderful parents.... but I won't!! I can't wait to see them, we are going to have so much fun!!!!